Pop music recap number who cares

Here it is. I'm writing about pop music again because... I like to!

Starboy- The Weeknd

"Girls get loose when they hear this song." That's a true fact!
 

I'm a big fan of the Weeknd. Why? I don't know. Read my last pop music re-cap. The Hills was pure gold. So good that now he's super rich and can write a song about how he's a star and can drive a red Lamborghini. Honestly, I'm kind of disappointed because I really thought he was talking about a red colored lamb (the animal) and I thought it was some drug metaphor that I had never heard of, but when I watched the video I realized he was just talking about a car. BORING. No one cares about cars except rich people. Anyway, I guess he cut off his weird hair, which somehow makes his face less attractive. Maybe I just noticed his face because I wasn't looking at his hair. It doesn't matter. This video was pretty dumb overall. I have a very clear mental image of what I think the video should look like in my mind. It has to do with a blonde girl wearing underwear and doing a lot of cocaine off of a glass topped table which has a base made of antlers. Oh well, sorry the Weeknd, should have asked me for a creative concept for you. 

Shawn Mendes: Looks like he's twelve and I skip his songs every time they are on the radio because his songs makes me think of generic church music combined with pure garbage. I'm not posting a video because I don't want to have to see one or hear his voice again.

Closer- The Chainsmokers ft. Halsey

The first time I heard it I hated it and wanted to kill it. I even woke up at 4am with it stuck in my head and couldn't stop thinking about it to the point of wanting to kill myself instead of the song. But then, I couldn't escape the song. It's EVERYWHERE. I haven't heard a song infiltrate the world in such a way since like... I don't even know. It's horrible. Anyway, I kind of like it now. It's like the Stockholm Syndrome of the pop music world. This is the first time I've seen the video, it automatically turned on Youtube when I finished watching Starboy. My first reaction was absolute hate at the guy's face. He looks like a douche bag asshole shit head with a smug fucking face that I want to punch in the nose until it bleeds. Halsey looks cute and I like her. As the video goes on and I have to listen to that stupid Blink 182 reference, I sort of start realizing maybe the guy is kind of hot. And then by the end of the video I'm like "oh yeah, that guy isn't so bad!" You know what! I feel the same way about his stupid face as I do about his stupid shitty song! How does that even happen!? It just creeps up on you and then you're stuck forever not hating the song and not hating the guys face. He is really lucky it doesn't work the opposite way for him.

P.S. The Chainsmokers is a stupid name. I hope the band name gets emphysema for glorifying cigarette smoking.

This Town- Niall Horan

Currently obsessed with this song. I don't know if my mom can hear what I'm doing in the other room, but if she can, she's probably really sick of this song. I've listened to it about a million times in the past two days. I think it's a nearly perfect sentimental song. If you can't relate to this song in some small way you are a heartless turd nugget.

PILLOWTALK- Zayn

This song is hot. He knows what he's doing. Girls probably go absolutely crazy for this. I know I do and I'm approaching the point where it's probably a little weird to be so into pop music. The video sucks and so does the fact that all the song titles might as well be SPelLeD lYk Diz. 

Perfect Illusion- Lady Gaga

I was pretty disappointed when I heard Perfect Illusion for the first time, I think partially because of how much I love Lady Gaga and I knew that Kevin Parker from Tame Impala helped produce it. That being said, I was expecting a lot. It didn't grab me as strongly as a lot of her other songs have, but in the context of the whole album it grew on me a lot. Joanne is definitely my favorite Lady Gaga album so far. I think it needs to be listened to through straight through, and repeatedly, by everyone. The feeling it gives me is usually a feeling my body reserves for Hanson, Ceremonials by Florence and the Machine, or the song Broadripple is Burning by Margot and the Nuclear So & Sos. That probably doesn't mean anything to anyone else, but to me, that's fucking outrageous. This album is so good I haven't stopped talking about it since it's release.  When listening to the album straight through, Perfect Illusion fits right into the sequence and that sequence turns an otherwise average song into something beautiful and important. Needless to say, listen to the freakin' CD if you haven't already.

Rise- Katy Perry

I generally hate inspirational pop music. I like pop music to be about love, sex, drugs, and dancing. Katy Perry keep writing this inspirational crap though, and I still like it. She could write about a plastic bag and I would still like it. Oh wait, she did. I've loved her since the first time I heard "I kissed a girl" and I always will. I didn't even hold a grudge when she released the worst music single of the twenty-teens, ET ft. Kanye West. OK I sort of did hold a grudge because it's been 5 years and I still can't get over how fucking awful it was. But, aside from that, I think she's a perfect beautiful wonderful amazing weird kind of creepy-eyed psycho princess. I wish I could be her for a day or maybe longer if I liked it. This song is pretty good in my shitty opinion. Good job Katy, rise above songs like ET! You get to write songs for the Olympics! You get to have cute dogs! You get to publicly not get along with Taylor Swift! You're the shit!

Cold Water- Major Lazer ft. Justin Bieber and someone else I don't care about

EVERYONE KNOWS I LOVE JUSTIN BIEBER. SORRY!!! JUST KIDDING I'M NOT SORRY!!!! Purpose was the best thing to happen to me in late 2015/early 2016 (besides meeting my current boyfriend who somehow puts up with my horrible music taste.) Now that I've burnt myself out on Purpose I have this gem and "Let me love you" to listen to.  Yay! It's weird because everyone wants to talk about JB is such a little asshole and stuff but I don't even care. Remember when he peed in a mop bucket and it was big news? Remember that you remember that? Our lives are so pointless.

What it's like to work in an animal shelter

Animal shelters are really a place of complete mixed emotions. Within a single day, or even an hour, we can see the best and worst things humanity has to offer. There have been days where we have someone come in with a big donation towards an animal they heard had an injury. That person makes me feel like life is good, and people are good, and the world is good. But then, two hours later, someone leaves their dog in their car in a parking lot in 100-degree weather, and calls me a cunt because I have the audacity to charge them a fine and let a police officer give them a ticket.

In the mornings, we clean up shit. Literal shit, pee, puke, sometimes blood. We have three hours in the morning to make the place presentable to the public, and make sure the animals are fed, make sure they are medicated, make sure they are all accounted for. Some days, we have no help at all, just our meager staff of somewhere between three and six people cleaning every cage and kennel in the facility. I don’t know if you have ever seen the kennel of a dog that’s been unattended for 12+ hours, but it’s gross. Imagine what an un-housebroken animal might do with its feces in a confined space for that long. Imagine that kennel multiplied by seventy. That’s what we get to clean every day, and that’s not even including the cats or chihuahuas in small cages.  So we sweat our asses off in 100-degree weather, or pouring rain, to make sure these animals don’t have to be in their own crap for any longer than is absolutely necessary.

Then we open to the public, and they walk in with noses plugged and say, “Wow. It smells in here.”
Well, what do you think it would smell like when you have one-hundred-and-something animals in one place?

I don’t know how many times I’ve sat on the cold, hard concrete floor of a kennel with a terrified dog in my lap with tears streaming down my face. I can’t even ask myself why the animals end up there anymore, because it’s too sad. I try to focus on the fact that at least they made it somewhere safe, and at least we are there to love them, and at least they will have a fair chance at a life better than what could have been in whatever situation, but sometimes that’s not enough. Sometimes I don’t have the time to sit with any animal at all because I’m so busy make sure they aren’t stepping in their own poop, and making sure customers at the front desk aren’t verbally berating my coworkers or myself because we said, “we don’t have the room to take your animal right now. I realize it’s peeing on the carpet, but we have a waiting list for surrenders.”

When people ask where I work, they say, “That must be so fun. You get to play with animals all day!” But they don’t realize that we don’t. I wish we did. The animals wish we did, but there’s no time to socialize them nearly as much as we should. We are busy fighting fires and calming down disgruntled people who are angry they have to pay for our services when their dog was found running in the middle of a busy road, unattended. Rather than saying, “Thank you for taking care of my beloved lost pet. I was so worried.” They say, “How could you charge me that much money! He’s only been there for an hour!”

Do you know what can happen in an hour? An animal can be hit and killed, or severely mangled. Did you know? In the hour that your animal was at the shelter, we have examined, vaccinated, and soothed your animal. We have set up a clean kennel for your animal. After your animal leaves, we have to re-sanitize that kennel, EVEN IF THE ANIMAL WAS ONLY THERE FOR ONE MINUTE. That is because we want your animal to be healthy, and safe, not because we are dick-heads that want to take your money for some crazy governmental conspiracy in which you are the prime target.

Then, someone comes in and sees you cuddling a cute fuzzy little dog and says, “Are you going to kill that dog?”
Or you meet a new person who says, “It must be tiring killing animals all day.”

Like the fact that I’m at an animal control facility means I’m a murder machine. How many times a day do we have to explain that we only euthanize animals that are incredibly sick, or super aggressive. And I want to tell them, that every life that comes through our door matters to us, and we don’t take euthanasia lightly. I can remember the face of nearly every dog we have had to put down. Sometimes I think about them when I can’t sleep at night, and no matter how legitimate the reason is for euthanasia, it doesn’t make the decision any easier and it doesn’t make my heart any less heavy.

Working in an animal shelter is like having your heart broken into a million pieces every single day, and for some reason you keep picking up the pieces and gluing them back together when you know full well that tomorrow it’s going to happen all over again.  But I keep coming back, because I can imagine the faces of the dogs staring at me. I hear the voices of people telling me, “I could never work here. I love animals too much.” And I want to slap their well-intentioned statements back into their mouths, because they don’t realize that here I am: this is my expression of a love bigger than I’ve ever known. Love is very reason that I’m at that place every single day, even though some days I don’t think I can do it for even a second longer.

Something not important

So far, this year has proved to me that sometimes two people need to break up. Like, they really are a terrible combination and despite all the back and forth and the fact that they probably care a lot about each other, they should just BREAK THE FUCK UP!

Case in point:

Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber.

(Justin Bieber- No Pressure)

That shit was so up and down people stopped giving a shit all together. But you know what.... they broke up for reals this time and their music is SO MUCH BETTER NOW! Really, think about it. They both had decent songs in like 2010/2011 (Baby and Love You Like A Love Song) but then everything else kind of sucked. And now... they are both fucking pop music champions! I mean, I know the correlation isn't necessarily because they broke up. They probably are getting to the age where they realize what does or doesn't work that well for them, but still. I like to think it's related.

Justin Bieber is like "I was a shit head let me write songs about it." Selena is like "I am hot and I'm going to show it off because I don't have a jealous shit head boyfriend to worry about!" Good for you both! A+, trophies all around!

(Selena Gomez- Hands to Myself. The best of her new singles)

Other good things:

Every song on the Weeknd's album except Angel. Really. People should never have a song called Angel. Didn't anyone learn a lesson after Shaggy's song Angel???

(Shaggy- Angel, in case you forgot what song I was referring to)

Listening to the Weeknd makes me wish I did a lot of drugs because I want to be as cool as him and I want to fuck two bitches before I see the person I like at half past five in the morning.

(The Weeknd- the Hills)

The song Here by Alessia Cara. I just found out her name today and I googled her. Did you know she's Canadian? Canada is ON FUCKING FIRE right now. Did you know: Drake, Justin Bieber, the Weeknd, are all from Canada? What is this?? It's like a conspiracy.

(Here)

Work by Rihanna

This song is irresistible.

(Work)

Bad things:

Stressed Out by Twenty One Pilots. Make it stop. I'm annoyed. I'm not even going to share the video because I don't want to accidentally hear any of the song.